The child within us is simple and daring enough to live the Secret.

My friend Diane gave me a Cd with some slow songs. Again, calming.

One song is sung by Andrea Bocelli "I can't Help falling In Love with You"....it is so beautiful. The song, the lyrics, his almost childish accented voice, the instrumentals. Very touching. I think I listened to it about 30 times today.

Why do we Hum in yoga? Yoga is as much about concentrating as it is about form and stretch and breathing.

Sometimes during a yoga sitting resting pose we hummmm. This is to keep our minds from wandering. It is said meditation is one of the hardest things to do. Can you do it? Can you sit with a clear mind and NOT THINK aboout ANYTHING.

Not what your going to make for dinner tomorrow or if your kids are home and safe. Not how you back aches or your leg is itching. Not how tired you are. Not how much you love, hate, miss, want your wife, husband, lover, mother or friend.

None of that..just nothing. Even a few moments of meditation is calming and relaxing and puts life into perspective. Try it.

Concentrating on your breath: In and Out...it helps to block out other things. Chanting or Humming helps eliminate the mortal world further. Prayer is sometimes a form of meditation.

It leaves you calmer and less frantic.

It may even allow you to leave your antidepressants at the door.

I am a part time real estate agent. I love looking at houses. It feels a bit intrusive to walk through someone else's home examining things, but fun. I can't help looking at family pictures displayed or the decor and furnishings or the color of the towels. I like to see the laundry area. Some people hang the laundry on lines in the basement. GREAT! I wish I did that. I have too much laundry to even think about it. I always look at the books on the book shelves. When there are books there that I have never heard of, or read, or added to my wish lists, I kind of freak out. I make mental notes to go home and look up the stuff I have been missing. I know I 'm weird. My son called me geeky the other day. He had no idea how excited I was to be called a geek.

Sometimes you meet interesting people. There are a few who stand out as eccentric or extremely nice or just real people. I find most people to be more cautious and protective about their money than they generally are about their health. Also, when people are sick they are more open to help and assistance. Money makes people uptight and nervous and defensive. I am the last person in the world you can't trust. I would never intentionally do anything to hurt someone else or take advantage. It isn't in my nature.

I met an elderly (of course) lady who sold her house and wanted to move to another similar home...small row house with two bedrooms, in good to great condition, in a nice neighborhood. She could barely climb the stairs. I took her to see approximately 17 homes. I had to pick her up because she did not drive. She'd be waiting at the door for me in slacks and a blouse with a matching scarf or kerchief. I prayed she'd have on a kerchief. On sunny days she added over sized sunglasses. She wore no make up except for bright pink lipstick. She must have been something in her day. Each day we'd view the homes and discuss them and then I'd drop her off back home. After a while she found a few she was interested in and she wanted to go back to have a second look. She said her brother, who she lived with , would be joining us. I picked them up in the regular fashion. The brother was taller and stronger looking with thick glasses that were taped on one side and a jacket that buttoned from the top of his neck to the waist. He struggled to get in and out of the car. He had poor hearing and vision and was a bit slow mentally.

She was his caretaker. They were in their late 70's to early 80's.
He got in the car and said, "Oh, you didn't tell me HOW pretty she is, or how thin!" We were friends immediately. As we drove through the street he commented on my children and my husband and my nursing job. I realized they had many discussions about me; after I dropped the sister off she filled him in on all our conversation details. He liked my blue dress. During the tours of the homes he explained in detail the electrical system and plumbing and did a kind of show and tell with the wires and pipes. I learned about their 2 other siblings and their families and situations. Eventually they made an offer and then backed out after the home inspection. I do not think they felt comfortable with this change but their home was sold and they had to find somewhere to live. We took a break from viewing homes due to the hot weather. She took care of her brother as he doctored often. After about a month, I called them to check in..the brother told me the sister had a stroke and died. He would move into a senior apartment building. We talked about our house hunting adventures and he told me how she always looked after him. He sounded sad but accepting. Then he asked if he could call me if he ever needed a nurse. "Of course" , I said.

Customers, patients...they're all people; needy people, just as I am; we all help each other in whatever way we can and we go on to do it again and again until the end.

I could almost feel it; the burning rays of the sun on my back as I walk and hunt for shells; my favorite summer pass time. The tumbling waves astonish me again and again. Who are all the creatures living there? And how was their winter?

As I am apprehensive to change a routine that is sometimes grueling, sometimes weary, and always productive, I try to remember the moments of contentment and calm. The quiet fills with laughter of friends and family. I am grateful for a little bit of heaven.

My kids grow excited as they think of the wide open days of summer. No school. No camp. No restraints. No schedules. Hopefully they will come to view the books to be read as pleasure and not as assignment. The tinkle of the wind chimes, the whipping of the awning, the starkness of the blaring sun in the middle of a July afternoon all lull me into a divine state. We'll scour the barbacue and fill up the ice maker. We'll accustom our toes to the thongs and the bareness. We'll drink gin and mohito's and beer (hopefully) and slurp up just dug clams and crabs and watermelon. We'll wonder how long it's been since last year and how fast time goes. We'll sweat and swim and lose some productiveness. We'll rest and use up all of our quality time.

This week is the beginning of summer. I hope I am ready.